CHANGE YOUR THINKING CHANGE YOUR LIFE
that someone else may not approve. He projects his childhood rela-
tionship with his parents onto the important people in his adult
life—spouse, boss, relatives, friends, authority figures—and tries
desperately to earn their approval, or at least not lose it.
The fears of failure and rejection, caused by destructive criti-
cism in early childhood, are the root causes of most of our unhap-
piness and anxiety as adults. We feel, “I can’t!” or “I have to!”
continually. The worst feeling is when we feel, “I can’t, but I have
to!” or “I have to, but I can’t!”
We want to do something, but we are afraid of failure or loss,
or if we are not afraid of loss, we are afraid of disapproval. We
want to do something to improve our lives, at work or at home,
annaabi.ee 
